This has pissed me off enough for me to blog about it. Oh look! There’s even a Facebook page for it. I did a search for “HSBC sucks” and got about 393,000 results.

So the story goes:

I need to update the mailing address on my HSBC credit card because we’ve moved. The updating of address for other banks were a lot less painful but for HSBC, it is painful with a capital P! They do not allow updates to be done over the phone ‘for security reasons’. There are only 2 ways to get it done:

  1. Head down to their physical bank, stand in line and get the address changed.
  2. Fill up a lengthy form (see below) and send it to them via snail mail.


I get a headache looking at the tiny boxes and the immense amount of information I have to re-write all over again when they already have all my information in their database. And..snail mail? Seriously? I don’t even know where’s my nearest mailbox!

I also don’t get the “cannot do over the phone for security reasons” bit. Whenever you call a bank to enquire about anything, don’t they go through a whole slew of questions ranging from your full name, identity card number, to your birthdate, right down to your mother’s maiden name? Is that not secure enough? Once I clear those questions, I get information about my credit card outstanding balances, etc OVER THE PHONE. And yet, I can’t update my mailing address the same way. I DON’T GET IT.

Now, of course, I could go waste my time and stand in line at the bank to update the address. But let’s check out their branches and more importantly, their opening hours. Who has the time?!

Yes, I could simply apply for online banking but I don’t actually use the card much. I applied it simply because my mum wants it for her shopping at Giant. I don’t even carry the card in my wallet! So I asked if I can apply for online banking and statements so that I don’t need to fuss over paper bills.

The answer is: No mam, you have to wait for our system to update the mailing address before you can call us back (!!!) and request for a PIN number. Once you receive that, you can then go online and register for e-banking facilities.

Me: Will I then get a letter to let me know that the mailing address has been updated?

Answer: No mam (!!!). You will have to look out for the next paper statement at your new address.

Ok. So this just means that I have to remind myself to look out for the next HSBC statement in the mail, call them again (by pressing a million numbers and options) to request for the PIN number, then wait for it to be mailed to be, then go online to request for e-banking facilities.

Typing out the convulated work flow just tired me out, gawdamnit.

Why do they make it so difficult for me to UPDATE MY MAILING ADDRESS? Can you imagine the amount of paperwork the bank needs to process with the amount of paper mail they get from people asking them to UPDATE THEIR ADDRESS? And in this age and time – welcome to the year 2013, yo – why is HSBC stuck in pre-historic times? Maybe that’s why they are the ‘world’s local bank’. Local probably means a village stuck in time somewhere in the crevices of the universe. A place where fire is started by rubbing stones together and people walk around naked with bones in their hair.

HSBC, all the obscene marketing dollars you spend in a year is not going to get rid of the fact that YOUR PROCESSES SUCK and you need to move on with the times.

Right. Thanks for reading. Over and out.


One thought on “HSBC, you SUCK.

  1. I AGREE!!!! That day before you girls arrived at Cafe Melba, I was juggling my phone and heavy bags and laptop and wriggly toddler and snapping at this HSBC girl on the line because HSBC called me TWO months after I had CANCELLED my HSBC credit card to tell me that they had mistakenly given me $40 too much when they reversed a previous charge to my card and gave me the refund via a cheque, which I had already banked in.

    No explanation of why the amount of $40; no explanation of how it had happened; no apology for their mistake; just “You need to pay us back $40 m’am”. I asked how in the world was I suppose to pay after having cancelled my account, and cut up and thrown away the card and not knowing what my card details were anymore. I was told to pay them back via cheque.

    Asked if they could please send me a paper statement setting out the details of their error. Their reply: “No m’am, you had signed up for e-banking and requested for no paper statements.” WTF?!?!?!?! How am I suppose to e-bank if my card and account have been cancelled?!

    Ended the call by barking at the girl to just “SEND ME A PAPER STATEMENT!!!” and hung up. Told D that very night that HSBC’s tagline should be ‘THE WORLD’S WORST EVER BANK’.

    But wow, I like your stone age description. Very vehement. They totally deserve it.

    I had spent months applying for their card because they didn’t believe that I earned enough to deserve one. Only to find that I couldn’t pay my bills via online inter-bank transfers from other banks. Only via stone age methods like cheques or by hunting down an AXS machine. Their phone banking service sucks too. Thought my life would be easier once I cancelled their stupid card but they even managed to prove me wrong on that.


    Thanks for listening.

    (Wow, that could have been a whole blog entry in itself.)

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